Wednesday, 8 January 2014
Is It Love That You're After, or Just a Good Time?
After this week's episode of the Real Love Show on www.RuachRadio.com, I had to ask the question, Is it love that you're after, or just a good time? (Find the Real Love Show on iTunes)
We were debating the real life scenario of a couple in a relationship of 16 years plus, where the woman says, "we both know this relationship is leading to marriage" and the man says words to the effect, "where did you get that idea"; it raises the question of what the entire relationship is all about.
I cannot imagine for the life of me, staying with a man for 16 months never mind 16 years unless it was clearly understood to both of us where we were going. And that we were both on the same page. My mother taught me better than that!
I mean, fair enough, if you are happy to spend your life in such fashion. There are some that say there are not enough men and that all women cannot expect to be married. If that is your truth and that thinking works for you, you can believe it and live it. But people are getting married all the time. I have 4 weddings to go to all before May.
If you have never wanted to settle down and raise a family (I did not say, have kids, but raise a family) and are prepared to give yourself to various men and relationships without a commitment to anything further it can work. I stipulate raising a family as opposed to having kids, as some people have the idea that they want kids and that's exactly what they get, but there is no man in the home, just them and their kid(s). But maybe that is another blog!
However, in this case the woman was expecting marriage to be the outcome. We can ask why is she still waiting 16 years later (that I don't understand, childbearing years are clearly long gone and you are no longer in your first bloom) if he doesn't want to marry you after all this time, what now?
I'm not impressed with the man or the woman in this case. Surely, a gentleman isn't going to lead a woman on for 16 years, giving her enough emotional crumbs she thinks he really cares, and the woman for not knowing her value.
As my favourite coach, +Ryeal Simms says "Women, you are the Chooser, not the Chosen, you are
Real Love Show is on iTunes
RealLoveShow -Long Term Relationship but No Ring Yet!The Real Love Show - Long Term Love but No Ring Yet!